Ready for some humor that’s a little cheeky? These buttocks puns are sure to crack you up. We’ve rounded up the best jokes about the posterior to fulfill your desire for a good laugh, so get ready to laugh your assets off.

Cheeky Buttocks Puns

1. I like big puns and I cannot lie.
2. You’re a pain in the butt, but you’re my pain in the butt.
3. Let’s get to the bottom of this.
4. That joke was rear-ly funny.
5. Stop being so cheeky!
6. I’m not trying to be glib, but your glutes are fabulous.
7. You have a great asset.
8. Don’t be so stern with me.
9. I can’t stand your behind-the-back comments.
10. This is the butt of the joke.
11. You really crack me up.
12. I’m feeling a bit bummed out today.
13. Let’s not make a rumpus about this.
14. You’re my better half-moon.
15. That’s some top-tier bottom humor.
16. I’m head over heels, or should I say, head over rears for you.
17. You’ve got a lot of boldness to make a joke like that.
18. Don’t be an ass-tute observer.
19. I’m trying to get a-head, but I’m always behind.
20. That’s quite a tail you’re telling.
21. You’re the apple of my bottom jeans.
22. I’m not a proctologist, but I know an ass when I see one.
23. Let’s turn the other cheek.
24. This party is going to be off the hocks.
25. You’re my one and fanny.
26. I’m absolutely smitten with your kitten.
27. That’s a load of caboose.
28. You’re looking fanny-tastic today.

Rear-ly Funny Puns

29. What do you call a sad butt? A bummer.
30. Why did the butt break up with the other butt? It felt cracked.
31. What’s a butt’s favorite type of music? Rump and bass.
32. Why was the butt so good at poker? It had a great flush.
33. What do you call a butt that tells jokes? A comedi-hen.
34. Why did the butt go to school? To get a little behind in its studies.
35. What’s a butt’s favorite movie? Gone with the Wind.
36. Why don’t butts get lonely? Because they come in pairs.
37. What did the left cheek say to the right cheek? “Together, we can stop this crap.”
38. How do you compliment a butt? “You look booty-ful today.”
39. What do you call a butt that’s a detective? Sherlock Holmes-lice.
40. Why did the butt get a promotion? It was on a roll.
41. What’s a butt’s favorite game? Hide and cheek.
42. Why are butts so good at arguments? They always have a strong comeback.
43. What do you call a royal butt? Your Heinie-ness.
44. Why did the butt stop running? It was pooped.
45. What’s a butt’s favorite holiday? Pranks-giving.
46. Why was the butt a good musician? It had a great sense of rhythm and caboose.
47. What do you call a butt in space? An ass-teroid.
48. Why did the butt get an award? For its outstanding performance in the rear.
49. What’s a butt’s favorite drink? A boot-tea.
50. Why did the butt join the circus? It was a natural tumbler.
51. What do you call a group of musical butts? A band of bottoms.
52. Why did the butt go to the library? To check out some rear books.
53. What’s a butt’s favorite exercise? Squats, obviously.
54. Why did the butt get a ticket? For cracking up in a no-joke zone.
55. What do you call a butt that’s a lawyer? A legal brief.
56. Why was the butt so calm? It knew how to turn the other cheek.

Buttocks One Liners

57. I’m trying to get my life in order, but I’m always behind.
58. That movie had a terrible ending, a real anti-climax.
59. I’m not lazy, I’m just in energy-saving mode, from the bottom up.
60. My favorite part of the day is the end.
61. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down, just like a good chair.
62. I’m not a fan of sequels, they always feel like a re-rear.
63. I’ve got your back.
64. Let’s kick some serious butt.
65. This is my last resort.
66. I’m at the bottom of the barrel here.
67. You’re a true asset to the team.
68. Don’t half-ass two things, whole-ass one thing.
69. I’m feeling cheeky today.
70. That’s the bottom line.
71. I’m bringing up the rear.
72. Let’s put this behind us.
73. I’m bummed that the weekend is over.
74. You’re a real pain in the backside.
75. I’m not mooning you, I’m just showing you my best side.
76. That idea is complete ass-inine.
77. I’m not perfect, but I’m perfectly me, from top to bottom.
78. Let’s make some headway from the behind.
79. I’m not a glutton, but I am a glute-on for punishment.
80. You’ve got some nerve, and some great glutes.
81. I’m not one to toot my own horn, but…
82. That’s a cheeky request.
83. I’m on my last leg, and my last cheek.
84. Let’s face the rear-lity of the situation.

Buttocks Dad Jokes

85. Why do butts make bad secret agents? They always leave a crack.
86. What did the butt say to the toilet? “You crack me up.”
87. I told my son a joke about his butt. It was a real gas.
88. Why did the man bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house, but he wanted to get to the bottom shelf.
89. My daughter asked me why her poop is always tapered at the end. I said, “So your butt doesn’t slam shut.”
90. What do you call a butt that’s been knighted? Sir Rump-a-lot.
91. I have a joke about my butt, but it’s a little behind the times.
92. Why did the butt get a job at the bakery? It was great at making buns.
93. What’s a butt’s favorite kind of story? A tale from the crypt.
94. I’m not saying you’re lazy, but your butt has a permanent dent from the couch.
95. Why did the butt get a standing ovation? Because it was outstanding in its field.
96. What do you call a butt that can sing? A derri-air-e.
97. I asked my butt for a loan. It said it was a little tight right now.
98. Why are butts so humble? They’re always at the bottom.
99. My butt is in a competition with my stomach. It’s a battle of the bulge.
100. What do you call a butt with a map? A rear admiral.
101. I tried to write a song about my butt, but I couldn’t find the right key-ster.
102. Why did the butt break up with the chair? It felt too constrained.
103. My butt has a PhD. A Pretty Huge Derriere.
104. What do you call a butt that’s a magician? The Great Rump-ini.
105. I’m not a fan of stairs. They’re always up to something, and my glutes are always behind.
106. Why did the butt go to the art museum? To see the fine arts and crafts.
107. My butt is like a bank. It has a large asset.
108. What do you call a butt that’s a philosopher? Socra-tease.
109. I’m trying to lose weight, but my butt keeps following me.
110. Why did the butt get a pet? It wanted a little company in the rear.
111. What’s a butt’s favorite TV show? Rear Window.
112. I have a great relationship with my butt. We’re very close.

Buttocks Jokes

113. Why was the butt so popular at parties? It always brought the junk in the trunk.
114. What do you call a butt that’s always on time? Punc-tush-al.
115. Why did the butt get a tattoo? It wanted to be a little more cheeky.
116. What’s a butt’s favorite type of investment? Junk bonds.
117. Why did the butt go to the doctor? It had a case of the bum-blebees.
118. What do you call a butt that’s a work of art? A master-piece of the rear.
119. Why did the butt get a job as a gardener? It was great at planting its roots.
120. What’s a butt’s favorite kind of weather? A little breezy in the rear.
121. Why did the butt get a dog? It wanted a companion for its daily walks.
122. What do you call a butt that’s a superhero? Captain Underpants, of course.
123. Why did the butt get a job in construction? It was great at bringing up the rear.
124. What’s a butt’s favorite type of math? Geo-metry, because of all the curves.
125. Why did the butt get a job at the post office? It was great at handling the junk mail.
126. What do you call a butt that’s a poet? A sonnet-sitter.
127. Why did the butt get a job as a chef? It was great at making buns and rolls.
128. What’s a butt’s favorite type of book? A tale of two cities, or a tale of two cheeks.
129. Why did the butt get a job as a musician? It had a great sense of rhythm and bass.
130. What do you call a butt that’s a historian? An expert in the rear-view.
131. Why did the butt get a job as a comedian? It had a great sense of humor and a lot of cracks.
132. What’s a butt’s favorite type of car? A hatchback.
133. Why did the butt get a job as a tailor? It was great at making seat adjustments.
134. What do you call a butt that’s a scientist? A glut-eal expert.
135. Why did the butt get a job as a teacher? It was great at getting to the bottom of things.
136. What’s a butt’s favorite type of dance? The booty-scootin’ boogie.
137. Why did the butt get a job as a detective? It was great at cracking the case.
138. I’m in awe of your posterior.
139. What do you call a butt that’s a pilot? A rear-jet operator.

Buttocks Captions

140. Just a little cheeky.
141. Sun’s out, buns out.
142. Having a booty-ful day.
143. This view is the bomb.
144. Life’s a peach.
145. Bringing up the rear.
146. I like my puns intended.
147. Don’t be a bummer.
148. Just clowning around from behind.
149. This is my better side.
150. Feeling peachy.
151. The tail end of a great day.
152. It’s all behind me now.
153. Working on my assets.
154. Keep your squats low and your standards high.
155. Hindsight is 20/20.
156. The end.
157. Living life on the edge… of my seat.
158. Just rumpin’ around.
159. This is my final form.
160. No ifs, ands, or butts.
161. Let’s get to the bottom of this adventure.
162. A little junk in the trunk.
163. That’s the whole shebang.
164. I’m not one to sit around.
165. This is my happy place, from front to back.
166. The best is yet to come, but the rear is pretty great too.

Buttocks Puns For Cards

167. Hope your birthday is booty-ful!
168. I love you with my whole butt. I would say heart, but my butt is bigger.
169. You’re a true asset. Happy Birthday!
170. No ifs, ands, or butts, you’re the best!
171. Have a fanny-tastic birthday!
172. I’m not trying to be cheeky, but I think you’re great.
173. Let’s get this party started, no butts about it.
174. You’re one of a kind, from top to bottom.
175. I’m so glad we’re cheek to cheek.
176. You crack me up! Happy Birthday.
177. Hope your day is as peachy as you are.
178. I’m behind you 100%.
179. You’re the apple of my eye, and the peach of my life.
180. Let’s make this a day to remember, from beginning to end.
181. You’re my better half.
182. I’m not just saying this for reassurance, but you’re amazing.
183. You’re the best, bar none and butt none.
184. I’m nuts about your butt.
185. Let’s have a rump-roaring good time!
186. You’re a real peach. Happy Birthday!
187. I’m so happy to have you in my rear-view.
188. You’re the whole package, from front to back.
189. Let’s celebrate your assets!
190. You’re the end-all, be-all.
191. I’m not just pulling your leg, or your cheek.
192. You’re a real knockout, from head to toe, and everything in between.
193. Let’s get down to the bottom of this celebration.

Did You Know? Buttocks Fun Facts

194. The gluteus maximus is the largest and strongest muscle in the human body.
195. Humans are the only primates with prominent, rounded buttocks, which help with upright posture and running.
196. The scientific study of the buttocks is known as pygiology.
197. The shape of a person’s buttocks is determined by the underlying bone structure of the pelvis and the distribution of muscle and fat.
198. In many cultures throughout history, prominent buttocks have been seen as a symbol of fertility and beauty.
199. The word “buttocks” has been in use since the 14th century, derived from the Old English word “buttuc,” meaning “end.”
200. Sir Mix-a-Lot’s 1992 hit “Baby Got Back” spent five weeks at number one on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.
201. The technical term for the crack is the intergluteal cleft.
202. Your glutes are made up of three muscles: the gluteus maximus, gluteus medius, and gluteus minimus.
203. Sitting for long periods can cause your glute muscles to weaken, a condition sometimes called “gluteal amnesia.
204. Strong glutes are essential for athletic performance, helping with power, speed, and stability.
205. The world record for the most walnuts cracked with the buttocks in one minute is 212.
206. The term “derriere” is a French loanword that literally means “behind.”
207. In ancient Greece, the “Callipygian Venus” was a famous statue celebrating beautiful buttocks.
208. The average person’s buttocks weigh about 10% of their total body weight.
209. The fat stored in the buttocks is different from visceral fat and may have some health benefits.
210. The gluteus medius is crucial for stabilizing the pelvis when you walk or run.
211. The term “keister” as slang for buttocks is believed to have originated from German or Yiddish.
212. The ischial tuberosity, or “sit bones,” are the parts of your pelvis you sit on.
213. The color of the skin on the buttocks can sometimes be darker due to friction and pressure.
214. The gluteal fold is the horizontal crease at the bottom of each buttock.
215. The first documented use of the word “booty” to refer to the buttocks was in the 1920s.
216. The coccyx, or tailbone, is the final segment of the vertebral column, located just above the buttocks.
217. The piriformis muscle is a small muscle located deep within the buttocks that helps rotate the hip.
218. The clunial nerves provide sensation to the skin over the buttocks.
219. The shape of the buttocks can be categorized into four main types: square, V-shape, round, and heart-shape.
220. The phrase “pain in the butt” was first recorded in the 1930s.

Final Thoughts

We hope you got a kick out of these buttocks puns. No ifs, ands, or butts about it, this list was designed to be the butt of all jokes. Hopefully, they didn’t fall flat and you had a rear-ly good time!

Loved these puns? Keep the fun going with our interactive Oh What A Pun Generator – An interactive pun maker that lets you type any word, choose your style, and watch clever puns appear instantly. Give it a whirl!